


Changing Protocol 2: Ok Boomer

by orphan_account



Series: Science Bros. 2.0 [5]
Category: Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Crack Fic, Gen, Ok Boomer, Pranks, Science Bros 2.0, They're All Chaos Gremlins
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-22
Updated: 2019-12-22
Packaged: 2021-02-26 05:40:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,832
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21898303
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Peter, Shuri and Harley edit FRIDAY's nicknames for all the Avengers, and they use the best meme to do it. Tony needs a break.
Relationships: Harley Keener & Peter Parker, Harley Keener & Peter Parker & Shuri, Harley Keener & Shuri, Harley Keener/Peter Parker (If you really squint), Peter Parker & Shuri
Series: Science Bros. 2.0 [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1062917
Comments: 3
Kudos: 288





	Changing Protocol 2: Ok Boomer

**Author's Note:**

> Wow, this series isn't dead! Enjoy some more Science Bros 2.0, this time featuring Harley Keener, because if you at the rest of my Ao3 page I kinda fell in love with Harley after Endgame.
> 
> This fic is like Changing Protocol (link [ here ](https://archiveofourown.org/works/15144866)), but you don't really need to read it or any of the other fics in this series to understand this. Unless you want to.
> 
> NOTE: for the record, yes, I _know_ that almost none of the team qualifies as boomers, but just go with it for the meme, please?
> 
> Any other errors are mine, so if you see any, please point them out! Otherwise, happy reading!

“Guys, this didn't work last time.”

“Well last time, Peter...” Shuri's fingers dance on the laptop keyboard.

“You didn't have us,” Harley finishes for her. He smirks and leans back in Peter's desk chair, propping his feet up on the table.

Peter groans and flops facedown on his bed. Having Shuri and Harley Keener visit the Avengers compound was both the best and worst thing to happen this summer. On the one hand, it's great to have friends, but Harley and Shuri are pranksters to rival Loki and it's a miracle the three of them haven't gotten in trouble yet.

Although Tony was the one who invited the other two over, so technically he had this coming.

“Okay, how are you sure Mr. Stark won't catch us this time?” Peter says to the mattress. “He already knows I've tried renaming his systems before.”

“Oh, he'll catch us all right,” Shuri says cheerfully. “He just won't have any proof. I'm making sure to cover our tracks, and if he looks at the system logs it's gonna look like Tony changed the protocols himself.”

“Wait, you got his administration login?”

“Old man uses the same password for everything.” Harley pulls the laptop from Shuri and types something in, hitting the enter key with a flourish before passing it back. “See? Tony's a boomer and he deserves to know it. This is the perfect meme opportunity.”

“Oh God, you guys are gonna be the death of me,” Peter sighs. Shuri and Harley swivel to look at him, mischief in their eyes.

“We know.”

“I'm in,” Shuri announces, several minutes later. “Okay, here's Tony's name… does he seriously make FRIDAY call him 'boss'? We're gonna change that.” A few taps of the keys, and it's done.

“Oooh, hey,” Harley spins in his chair. “Can you get FRIDAY to call me 'Master and Lord of the Universe'?

“No,” Peter leans forward and swats the side of Harley's head, jokingly. “Your ego is big enough.” Harley sticks his tongue out at him.

“Excuse you, I am the most humble person to ever walk the Earth.”

“Hey guys, I know we were just planning on messing with Tony, but I have access to the names of everyone in the compound.” Shuri shows them the screen, where all the Avengers are listed. “Want to change them all?”

“Go big or go home.” Harley shrugs, while Peter deliberates. He's already going to be paying for this as it is, but he also doesn't want to miss seeing Sam's reaction to Bucky Barnes being called a boomer.

“Let's do it.”

Shuri times the system changes so their plan springs into action the next morning. The three of them get up at six so they don't miss anything, crowding on Harley's bed with Peter's laptop.

“Was it really worth getting up this early? It's summer vacation.” Harley yawns, trying to finger-comb his blonde curls and failing. “Plus I don't look dignified enough to be the mastermind of a plan like this.”

“You're wearing Baby Yoda pajamas,” Shuri reminds him. “You have no dignity to begin with.” Harley considers this.

“Fair enough.” He leans his head on Peter's shoulder and closes his eyes. “Wake me up when something happens then, I don't want to go to the kitchen for coffee and risk giving us away.”

“Sure.” Peter clicks a desktop icon on his computer, opening up a system backdoor to get into the security cameras. He found it a while ago, and although he's never really needed it, it comes in handy now. He pulls up different feeds for the kitchen, the living room and the hallway for the Avengers' rooms. Now it's just time to wait.

*****

“Good God, Steve, it's a Sunday.” Sam Wilson drags himself into the kitchen. “Why do you gotta keep getting up at the crack of dawn for these runs? You're Captain America, you're not gonna get fat if you skip just one morning.”

“It's routine,” Steve reaches for a loaf of bread. “'Sides, I'm not actually making you get up with me.”

“Yeah, yeah. One day I _will_ beat you at laps.”

“Keep telling yourself that,” Steve chuckles. “Hey FRIDAY, can you warm up the toaster oven?”

“Ok boomer.”

Steve pauses. Huh. That's an unusual answer. Tony must be playing around with FRIDAY's programming.

“Wait, repeat that.” Sam says. A grin is starting to form on his face.

“Ok boomer,” FRIDAY says again. And Sam bursts out laughing. Beside him, Steve is epically confused

“Man… oh man, this is great.” Sam doubles over, gasping. “You were born in, what, 1918, right? It works. And the best part is that _you_ , old man, don't even get it.”

“Don't get what?” Bucky wanders into the room sleepily, yanking his hair into a messy knot at the back of his head. “FRIDAY, can you check when Tony's gonna get more plums?”

“Ok boomer.” Sam is sent into another laughing fit.

“Let the record show,” he announces once he's gotten his breath back, “that on this day, Tony Stark got his AI to finally acknowledge these two walking fossils for what they truly are: boomers.”

“Ok boomer.” FRIDAY tells _Sam_. But Sam's not a boomer. His smile fades a bit.

Great. Tony's messing with them.

Clint is barely awake as he stumbles down the hallway. He has no idea what time it is, and he didn't even bother putting his hearing aids in. There's already a few people in the kitchen when he arrives; Steve, Bucky and Sam all seem to have gotten up around the same time. Sam appears to be explaining something to the other two.

 _FRIDAY, can you start the coffee machine,_ he signs sluggishly, knowing her cameras will catch the ASL. It's a perfectly normal thing to say, but the three other men seem to laugh.

“What?” Clint says blithely, before realizing that no one else here knows sign language, and he's too exhausted to concentrate on reading lips. He pulls his hearing aids out of his pocket and jams them into his ears. “What?” he repeats.

“FRIDAY, say what you said again,” Bucky calls. He's snickering behind his mug of tea.

“Ok boomer,” the AI tells him. _What the-_ oh. _Oh_. It's the goddamn meme, isn't it. Clint's seen a few of them floating around the Internet, but this is FRIDAY.

Clearly Tony's been having fun coding his AIs.

“Uh, who did that?” He points at the ceiling.

“Who knows,” Steve takes a bite of toast. “But she's been calling everyone who walked in here a boomer so far.”

“Good,” Natasha's voice says. “She's right.”

“Morning, Miss Romanoff,” FRIDAY greets brightly as Natasha saunters in. She snatches Sam's muffin out of his hand, pries off a piece and hands it back.

“Hey!” Clint says indignantly. “Why am I a boomer but Nat got to keep her name?”

“… My recent programmers deemed it unwise to call Natasha anything but her preferred titles, lest it put them in risk of physical harm,” FRIDAY responds after a few seconds.

“So Stark's scared of me,” Natasha hops up onto the counter. “Good to know I'm still doing my job right.”

“Oh come on, I'm an assassin too,” Clint grumbles. “This isn't fair.”

“Ok boomer.”

“Aw, shut up Nat.”

*****

Tony isn't expecting to have a whole crowd in his kitchen when he gets up. Almost everyone is there, and at least half of the team looks like they have no idea what's going on.

“There he is,” Clint claps. “The joker himself.” Huh?

“First of all, no one told me we were having a breakfast meeting,” Tony pushes his way past people. “Second, that coffee better not be all gone.”

“Chill, we saved some before Thor could drink it all,” Natasha says. “But I gotta hand it to you Stark, I wasn't even sure you knew what the boomer meme was.”

“The what? Speak English, please.” He has no idea what's happening.

“You mean you didn't do this?” Bruce asks. Tony's starting to get impatient now.

“Do _what_?” He opens the fridge. “FRI, we have eggs, right? I feel like omelettes today.”

“Ok boomer,” FRIDAY says.

“I'm sorry, what the hell?” Tony's taken aback.

“Ok boomer.” The phrase sounds vaguely familiar… Tony knows that 'boomer' basically means someone from an earlier generation, but he doesn't get it. He's not _that_ old.

“That's what we were trying to ask,” Rhodey says. “Someone changed it so FRIDAY calls all of us boomers- well, except Natasha because whoever did it doesn't want to make her angry. We all assumed it was you.”

“No, I didn't.” A thought begins to form. “Hold up, you said someone changed all our names in FRIDAY's database?”

“Yes.”

“And this is a meme reference?” Tony recalls a memory from about a year back.

“Yep,” Steve says.

A pause.

“Okay, I know who did this.”

*****

“Peter, come to the kitchen, now,” Tony's voice crackles over the intercom. “And if the other two stooges are up, bring them with you.” Peter closes the camera footage and shuts his laptop.

“That didn't take long for him to figure it out,” Shuri comments.

“Nope. Told you he remembers last time. Let's go.” Peter slides off the bed.

All the Avengers are waiting in the kitchen. Tony's arms are crossed, but at least he doesn't look to angry.

“Peter, I thought you would've learned after I grounded you last time,” he sighs. “but really? Getting into FRIDAY's systems _again_ and messing with everyone this time?” Peter makes eye contact with Harley and Shuri, who nods. Turning back to Tony, he puts on his best puppy-dog face.

“Mr. Stark, I have no idea what you're talking about.”

“Oh, don't try that with me,” Tony says. “You already have a track record. And these hooligans,” he gestures to the other two teens, “would do the same thing with you.” He glances at Harley. “Right?”

“Tony, you know I have nothing but respect for you,” Harley says innocently, blue eyes widening. “I would never, ever try to prank you.”

“Oh, sure,” Tony snorts. “Guys, just admit what you did and this will be easier on everyone.”

“Hmmm,” Shuri steps forward. “Tony, maybe you shouldn't be making assumptions so quickly.” She looks up. “FRIDAY, who was the last person to edit your name database?”

“Anthony Edward Stark, twelve hours ago,” FRIDAY announces to the room.

“We didn't do anything.” Shuri smiles in satisfaction.

“No, you have to be behind this,” Tony sputters. It's too early for this shit and he's having trouble coming up with a good counterargument.

“Ouch. Tony, blaming your stunt on teenagers? That's not setting a good example for them.” Natasha is smirking. Oh, she's _evil._

“Yeah, that's a little low, don't you think?” Steve chimes in. Clearly, he knows the truth here, too. Tony's going to kill all of them, he swears.

“I. Did. Not. Do. This.” He grits out.

Everyone else makes eye contact around the room before shouting out as one.

“OK BOOMER!”

**Author's Note:**

> It's been over a year since I updated this series, so I hope I didn't lose my touch.
> 
> If you liked this fic, then kudos, comments or subscriptions to this series would be great, and appreciated!
> 
> Thanks for reading!


End file.
